Get the FUCK off! This carpet aint big enough for the both of us.

Asshole of the year award goes to Alex Gibbs for the best April Fool's Day gag by letting the world know that he is engaged to the lovely Paige Rolla-Dooby-Didder-syughtheng. HAHAHA. I still dont know if this is a joke or not. If it is, hell yes. If it's not a joke, and real, well. HELL YES. Congratulations buddy. You are a fucking asshole. You sold out, and joined the club by committing to take the plunge. Seriously, I'm stoked for ya. I hope you invite me to ruin your wedding.

I'm going to see a cricket match this evening at a bar. Cricket is life here, and I"m excited to see how rowdy everyone gets behind their team, the Deccan FUCKING Chargers. They know, even Arnold knows. Go CHARGUHZ Go.

Society has changed a lot since the days of the internet. One way is your uncle or neighbor's porn stash. In the future, porn will be in a locked, or thought to be hidden file on a computer that any young adolescent can get to with a quick roll of the fingers across a keyboard. No longer are the days of finding a box of porno mags/videos in the woods, closet, or shed of your friends dad, or your neighbor. Those days are long gone, and will be soon forgotten. Also, you will no longer find cheat code books at a childrens book fair at the school's library. I guess that asshole can stick to Porsche posters and Clifford the Big Red Dog books. Speaking of Clifford, that was Martin Short's best movie. Watch it, and be amazed by the sheer genius. Dana Carvey tried to recapture the magic of this movie with some other stupid shit, but nothing will ever be as dumb or great as Clifford.

Baseball season is starting soon. The Braves are the talk of the town with Jason Heyward. We actually have a decent team. Larry "Chipper" Jones is going to take Bobby Cox's last ride this year one to remember. WORLD SERIES 2010. Fuck you for thinking otherwise.